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IS MASS SUICIDE THE ANSWER? 23-8-06
Peter Holmes
I forfeited the first live telecast game of this season for Saturday night socialising with friends. The early match on Fox Sports was Sheffield United's gritty draw with Liverpool. Sorry! not a penalty Gerrard, simulation Son, you dived!.
So, after a few hours of good company, a lovely belt loosening Italian meal and a few bottles of prime West Aussie red it was off home for the main event. A few years ago, that would have been a bout of bare arsed boxing leading up to the wild thing and "Did the Earth move for you Dear?"
"Of course it did you idiot you shagged me on top of the washing machine!"
These days it's a wee bit more prosaic. Home to sort out the kids; "Night, night, God bless, see you in the morning!" followed by "Go on Darl make us a cuppa char!" as the Bride snuggles up in bed knowing full well I'm on the late shift with Boro.
Finally, they are all knocking zeds out and snoring, so I loaded up Century FM, signed in, got a good connection, cranked up the volume to hear the happy and enthusiastic tones of Ally and Bernie telling me about Boro's brilliant start against Reading. You Beauty! Two nil up with good goals from England winger Stu Downing and the Yak finally back into the goal-scoring groove.
All that pre-season angst about our inability to score had evaporated and I was feeling very smug and expected us to wrap the game in brown paper and post a cruisey win.
A smell of burnt rubber assailed my nostrils as the dog passed wind and nearly made me puke. I chased him into the laundry which is a bit unfair as he doesn't chase me into the laundry when I let off a rasper. Anyway, I put another member of the ErimusRed clan to bed. Yes, I tucked the little vegemite in. I'm as soft as shite with dogs. Then on the return journey I grabbed a cold beer as I passed the fridge, then got back after just a few minutes to hear Ally proclaim; "Game on, Reading have equalised it's 2-2!" Wadafug?
The rest is history, we lost our shape and sloppily threw the game away, even though I hit the roof of the study when laconic Viduka scored, but didn't (see an optician linesman).
I listened the rest of the game out with a feeling of resignation then disappointedly cracked another beer to drown my sorrows to catch the mood of the phone in after the game broadcast. Then it started, and hasn't bloody stopped since. It's very like a 747 Boeing Jumbo sat on the tarmac ticking over, it's engines at throttled half pace, y'know, that piercing whining noise! Various Boro message boards were just the same, with a hell of a lot of negative whinging, with the jumbo noises replaced by "the end of the Boro is nigh" crap, writ large amongst avatars and signatures.
Now, while I am ranting, some punters on the telling bone to Century FM after the game, ring in from their mobiles as they leave the stadium and give opinion. That I take note of and listen to because they've got every right to tell it like it is as they've been to the game. What jacks me to the point of screaming heresy are the numb-nuts plonkers who ring in to whinge, especially after Riverside games, then admit; "No I don't go anymore Bernie, I stopped going when they put the Bovril up by tuppence'hapenny!" Then they drivel excreta and waffle crap about why they stopped listening to the Reading broadcast when we went 3-2 down!"
"Why was that," asks Bernie, "you'd had enough?"
"Nah! I had to pick our lass up from the bingo!"
They whinge about everything, the team, the tactics, the lack of signings, that ingrowing toe-nail, that outgrowing penis on their forehead. There was even criticism about Gibbo and frankly that is garbage!
Face facts! We lost 3-2, away from home, to a team who were playing their first ever game in the EPL, an extremely significant and historical one at that after 135 years of trying to break into the top flight of English football. You could say with some authority that they were very motivated and passionate so, were in the vernacular, " Well up for it!"
The Madjewski crowd were vocal, parochial and pumped, as you'd expect they should be and it wouldn't have taken much to get them singing and lifting the roof of the rafters.
Everybody I talked to here prior to the game, and by that I mean knowledgeable supporters of other EPL clubs, said to me rather you're mob than mine going to Reading. Consensus was, that they would be like an unfed junkyard dog let off the leash chasing after a taunting alley cat. So, nobody was really surprised when we were done over.
Now, with a few days to digest the result, a lot of reflection and the opportunity to watch the highlights on Fox, I just can't see what all the negative relegation talk is about.
For a start, we had a perfectly good goal disallowed, actually a very well constructed team goal of quality build up culminating in a well poached finish, which, would have made it 3-3. At that critical point in the game, which at the time was ebbing and flowing, the momentum would've been right back with us and who knows, we may have even stole the three points, at the very least it would have been headlined as; 'A classic at the Madjeski, a Thrilling 3-3 draw'.
In conclusion; Yes, it was down to poor defending, granted, along with not closing the game out for sure, BUT, also shite refereeing and a cock-eyed linesman as that was such an obvious onside. Thus, luck was not with us.
Now, I know you folks don't want me to start ranting about one of my major Association Football bugbears, about that useless fourth official acting in a judicial capacity by making a video ruling do you?
Thought not!
Basically, apart from our own professional misgivings, the lack of a rabbit's foot and the fact we took the pedal off the gas at 2-0, they, virginal Reading, had naff all to lose so played accordingly with attacking abandon. I know Arca had a nightmare but was he carrying an injury? The bloke he replaced, Quedrue, had a much bigger one for Fulham on Sunday, getting a roasting from all at Manchester United along with his other defensive pals.
Now ponder this. Imagine what it's like on Fulham's, Blackburn's, Manchester City's and even Charlton's main message boards at this moment as they all got belted far more comprehensively than we did. I'm not even going to venture from the COB board on to any other Boro boards or sites anymore because the white flag, thrown towel negativity is bad enough amongst us.
As critical of the downers as I am, my only purpose is just to give a sense of perspective here. Just read this and think.
In September 2004, Mark Hughes took up the reins at the three-point stealers, Blackburn Rovers. The very ordinary Graeme Souness had just jumped ship to the Jardies, much to the delight of the Rovers fans and the disgust of the Broon Ale quaffers. Hughes was a relatively new young manager, even allowing for the time he'd successfully held the Welsh national team together on a semi-part time basis. More of a coach for his National team, he even galvanised the under-performing Welsh into the top fifty of FIFA"s mathematically unfathomable rankings. So, in comparison with Gareth, a man of some proven pedigree even though in the EPL he was a rookie boss.
That first season Rovers finished fifteenth with only fourty-two points. His team didn't exactly set the world alight and even copped two consecutive 4-0 drubbings, one at home from Boro with a JFH hatrick and another to eventual Champions Chelski. In short, too many draws, not enough goals and a very robust style of play didn't endear him to his public. Last season, his second in full-time management, he had more of a chance to impose his style more effectively and to draft in some of his players. Blackburn finished sixth and qualified for the UEFA cup and finished only two wins away from a shock fourth position and entry to the elite Champions league.
Then there's was a bloke who was wanted by many EPL and Championship teams, after a very successful stint as a top line coach at one of the world's biggest clubs, he eventually chose a managerial role at a Premiership club. His team promptly got flogged in his first game in charge 4-0 at home by Arsenal, then went on to lose the first four games in one of the worst starts to a season ever.
With time and the imposition of his own values his charges improved before winning that club it's first ever major trophy, quickly followed by two successful stints in the UEFA cup culminating in a loss in last years final, before leaving to become England's new manager.
Remember him?
Now, my first glimpse of Boro live this season will be at 3am West Aussie time on Thursday morning, when I climb out of the sack and watch my beloved Boro as Chelski, the unbackable favourites for the EPL come to town. What are you going to do, listen to it on Century FM like I did on Satdee night or get off your arse and get down to the Riverside to support your team?
Or, are you just one of those moaning Minnies full of negativity making your protest? I know what I'd be doing if I was still living in the Boro. Cue Pigbag! My God I facetiously ask;
Is mass suicide the answer?
Where is all that against the World, up yours and bollocks Smoggy spirit gone?
Whinging like hell isn't going to improve Boro but getting behind them and giving them your full vocal and die-hard support most certainly is.
Positive vibes cause positive events to occur. Support from you lot is essential for this club's future and continuing growth and development. They need you as much as you need them!
Give Gareth a chance, a fair go as the Aussies say and, in time, he will deliver.
Enough said,
ErimusRed.
TALK ABOUT IT IN THE NEW HOLGATE MESSAGE BOARD
BACK TO PETER HOLMES' LETTER FROM AUSTRALIA INDEX
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