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CHEAT OF THE WEEK 15-11-07
Peter Owen
We'll start this week's feature with some correspondence with our readers. First up is an email from Ian Gill.
Why can't the football authorities punish divers and cheats by using video evidence
instead of hiding behind 'the ref's decision is final'? Rugby punishes offenders with no
problem at all.
We see all the dodgy dives and bad challenges anyway because there
are cameras at every match in the professional game and they are shown in endless
highlight shows.
I was pleased when the Milan goalie was punished for his ridiculous
collapse, I am not even bothered that the ban was reduced to one match because the key
thing was to shame the player. Have the authorities got the will to do anything?
Highly unlikely is the answer.
'Rugby respects its officials and football rejects its officials' sums up much. A referee
these days needs every eye that technology can open. If a player handles the ball on
the line he knows his immediate fate, but many a diver does not even see yellow.
Dida' s sentence should have been trebled, because appeal courts mock the game.
Robert Gannon nominated Hutton of Rangers as a cheat but was sadly beaten to the ball by a fan who had
the Blue audacity to nominate the entire Rangers squad and also throw in their manager.
Martin earned himself a Christmas card with this email...
Cheat of the week is fab. I like the play on words and the good humoured banter.
I also think the ref idea is 110% right, so keep up the good work.
Mark was also full of praise....
I enjoy your CofTW slot but its a shame that Anderson's yellow card waving (and I think he's
still rolling now) and Sir A Ferguson's riduculous rants did not get a bigger mention. The fact
that the latter is British seems to place him above the criticism directed towards Wenger and
Mourinho.
You took the words right out of my mouth Mark, because I was going to nominate Sam Allardyce
this week. No manager must ever defend an incident which has shamed their player/s. He
has as much chance of managing England as I have of riding Shergar at Sedgefield races.
Thanks guys, your posts were fan'tastic and good luck to every club... This week's Cheat of the Week nominations are:
Augustin Gllles Binya - Benfica
His stamp on Scott Brown's lower right leg was so vicious that Brown could have been
cheated from pursuing his career. If one dives - to deepen their boot as far as possible
into a fellow professional's lower limb then you are tagged accordingly.
Joey Barton - Newcastle
He had not the slightest intention of putting his boot anywhere, except into the guts of
Dickson Etuhu of Sunderland and the FA will no doubt confirm that.
Lee Bowyer - West Ham
He trapped the ball by the use of his left hand with full intent. I am not saying a word
about the referee's positioning whatsoever?
Daniel De Ridder - Birmingham
Now what did he fall over? A mole that had mistaken a Viagra tablet for a worm? My
applause goes to referee Steve Bennett who never had five hours to make up his
mind, unlike those bores on the box who cannot even see a dive inside replaysss!
And so to this week's two ex-refs.
Jeff Winter
Get Rid of Ridder. As you say the experts have looked at this one for hours. All I know
is that dives like that are better off in Eston baths. Even if he did get touched his
exaggerated fall from grace deserved a yellow card.
Bowyer was not far behind for his sneaky little handball and Barton really does long for
prison food doesn't he?
For the first time in a few weeks we have a genuine diver though so Ridder gets the
dubious distinction of my "Cheat of the Week".
Graham Frankland
My nomination this week has to be Birmingham's Daniel de Ridder. Who, I hear you cry?
Yeah, I had never heard of him either before Sunday's Birmingham derby but what a way to
announce yourself to the football loving British people by demonstrating that you are yet
another conniving cheating foreigner plying his trade in this country.
Some may argue
(mainly ex footballers who are now earning a living from punditry) that there was contact
with De Ridders' boot before he went tumbling to the ground. What none of the so called
experts failed to mention though was that the contact was clearly not enough to warrant his
theatrical dive executed for no other reason than to earn, no sorry - win his side an undeserved
penalty.
De Ridder adds his name to an ever-growing list of cheating PL footballers that stop at
nothing to gain an advantage for their team. Hang your head shame. This column demands it.
And so this week's winner is De Ridder.
Every stuntman in Hollywood would have cried at Ridder's pathetic performance.
I am so pleased that Scott Brown of Celtic is still in one piece after Binya tried to cripple the lad. Barton is Barton and a boot is a boot to him. Bowyer's hands should
be tied together for the next three games.
The limerick below stemmed from a feature written by Jeff Winter which simply spelt out
how a ref should pocket their cards to prevent minor mishaps and no-more.
Therefore, a smile completes the week unless you are a miserable cheat.
There once was a young ref from Tyneside
Who couldn't make up - or decide
When he dipped his hand in his pocket
He pulled out this red rocket
Cos his balls had also swapped sides
RIDDER - CULE is cheat of the week.
Cheat Of The Week is published weekly. No bullshit. No more cheating. Enough is enough. Contact us here with your nominations for Cheat of the Week.
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