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SOUTHGATE THE CONQUEROR 4-9-07
Toby Higgins
Ah, the French. Somehow the world wouldn't quite be the same without their chunky baguettes, their own brand of kissing and their willingness to jack it all in and go on strike at just a moment's notice. But by far their most beautiful quality is, of course, their language.
We, the English, spent 300 years speaking French after a fella called 'Guillaume le Conquérant' (though his Norman friends knew him better as "Billy") sailed over here in 1066 and started running the show. Because of that, over 30,000 'English' words now have a French origin. Ironically, one of them is 'pronunciation'; something not many Boro fans appear to have quite mastered yet.
Next time you are around a group of Boro fans talking the usual pre or post match nonsensical babble, you ask each of them what Boro's new French signing who wears number 11 is called. If anyone manages to say clearly, and without hesitation, "ali-adi-air", the ones who came up with something else need to buy the successful ones a drink, and shake them by the hand.
"Ali-dali-dair" was one I heard a few times on Saturday, "Ali-air" was a frequent one too, but my favourite, and the one that, remarkably, broke out into the form of a song (albeit briefly) was "Ali-dair".
"He's here,
He's there,
He's every fucking where,
Ali-dair."
No, he's really not. I think I'll stick with Jeremie.
After the language, and whether or not you can say his name, Aliadiere is clearly the best thing to come out of France, ever. He was one was of eleven who played with passion, vigour and pace, to not just 'do a job' against a lesser opponent, but mash him into the ground so that even the best jigsaw master in the world wouldn't be able to work out what he'd looked like before.
Bruce's blues were second best for the duration, and were fortunate not to have lost by at least three more goals than the deficit of two that stood come full-time. Had Lee Dong-Christie tapped in at the back post in the dying seconds, Julio Arca's header not been glanced just wide, and Young Luke's Ronaldo-esk shimmy not resulted in his shot being blocked on the line, 5-0 would have been fair and just.
Sitting as I was, as low as row five, gives the game a totally different complexion. To see the midfield trio of George Boateng, Fabulous Rochemback and Arca warming up with such focus and concentration in every pass was amazing. Three internationally recognised players, who only speak broken English as their only means of verbal expression, reading each other's body language, moving together from one routine to the next without as much as a word; just a glance of their experienced eyes. These guys are drilled to the extreme, and sometimes, it's all too easy to forget it.
There is nothing like being able to sit back, knowing that these players are fully prepared to commence in battle, and being able to trust them.
The atmosphere on Saturday was superb. Despite the measly attendance of just under 23,000, those who did show up were thoroughly entertained from the first moment to the last. The North Stand sang proudly, the West Stand clapped politely, and the East Stand held their hands to their eyes to protect themselves from the mid afternoon sun's glare. And every single one of them loved it.
Given the first three home performances of the season, nobody, but nobody, has the excuse that the football is poor and the atmosphere dead. Cheekily watching the goals on YouTube or some other illegal football showing website just won't hold up as an argument anymore; anyone who did that might have seen the goals, but they missed all the best bits.
It's probably fair to say that we won't play like that every game this season; but Christ, if we play half as well again, I'll be more than happy. The ticket prices are probably a little high, particularly when supply and demand appear to be so far out of equilibrium, but if you're a real fan, you'll make a sacrifice to be entertained by the team you love.
You want to spend £40 on Friday night getting pissed and buying a take away? Don't; instead, eat economy beans on toasted economy bread, drink tap water, and buy yourself a ticket in the new Holgate for Saturday. Playing the way we are, you won't regret it.
Prior to kick off, I'll confess to having worries. Boro on a three match unbeaten run at home to a newly promoted side inferior to us in every area on the pitch; it had away win written all over it in big blue letters.
But Boateng, Rochemback and Arca grasped the game instantly, wasting little in possession and with a marked willingness to play positive, purposeful football. Downing ran with menace and skill, while Mido already looks five times the play Yakubu ever was. Alidalidair's speed (the guy is lightning) as well as his unselfish running allowed space of others to roam forward, like Young and Taylor, who crossed for both goals. When was the last time Boro had both full backs attacking with such creative license?
Southgate is slowly but surely making Steve McClaren look very, very amateurish in the way he ran the club. It wasn't, of course, but Southgate has finally stamped his own logo on the players, the fans, and the club as a whole and not a moment too soon.
Same time next week.
UpTheBoro
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A GUARANTEED PROFIT OF AT LEAST £41.00 ON THE FA CUP FINAL
Did you know that it is possible to win money on Saturday afternoon's FA Cup Final clash between Portsmouth and Cardiff, whatever the result?
The game kicks off at 3.00pm and we can guarantee you a profit of at least £41.00, whatever the result of the match. All you have to do is follow the simple instructions below and then sit back and enjoy the game. At full-time (ninety minutes), you will be at least £41.00 better off, whatever the result of the match.
We must point out that if you want to take this bet, you should do it now because if the odds change, then the figures here will be invalidated. If they have changed, let us know and we will rework the bet for you.
You can still do this if you have a Betfair account but your overall profit will be reduced by £25.00 as you won't receive the £25.00 cashback as an existing account holder.
If you are unsure about this bet, you are most welcome to call us on 01642 223229 and we will help you as much as we can.
We're going to lay out a total of £129.00 on the FA Cup Final and we will collect £175.00 if Cardiff win, £171.24 if Portsmouth win and £170.00 if it's a draw. That's a minimum profit of 31%, a much higher interest rate than you will get in any high street bank.
Here's how it's done. Just follow these simple instructions.
1. Open an account with Coral. It is really important that you enter the bonus code of CORALTD when prompted. This is to ensure that you receive your bonus.
Open an account with Betfair. It is really important that you enter the promotional code of BFB425 when prompted. This is to ensure that you receive your bonus.
Open an account with Extrabet
 .
This shouldn't take you any longer than a few minutes.
2. Make the following deposits into your new accounts.
Deposit £20.00 into your new Coral account.
Deposit £84.00 into your new Betfair account.
Deposit £25.00 into your Extrabet account.
3. Now make the following bets.
Place £20.00 on Cardiff at 5.00 (4/1) with Coral.
Coral will now add a £10.00 bonus to your account. Place this on Cardiff as well. You will now have £30.00 riding on Cardiff.
Back Portsmouth with £84.00 at 1.78 (4/5) (or higher if available) with Betfair.
Place £25.00 on the draw at 3.44 (12/5) with Extrabet .
Extrabet match your first bet up to £25 so you will now have £50.00 riding on the draw.
The £25.00 matched bet will not show in your account but you can read all about how it works on the Extrabet site. It's the purple box that says '£25 FREE BET FOR NEW CUSTOMERS' on the top right hand side. Click here to visit the Extrabet site.
If you are unsure about placing these bets, please feel free to mail us or call us on 01642 223229 and we will talk you through it, no problem at all. There is no such thing as a stupid question.
You have temporarily laid out a total of £129.00 on the FA Cup Final. I stress, temporarily... Now sit back, crack a beer open and enjoy the match.
4. Here's what happens at the end of the game. All winnings are paid out on the ninety minute result.
If Cardiff win, you collect £175.00. That's £150.00 from Coral plus a £25.00 cashback from Betfair.
If Portsmouth win, you collect £171.24. That's £146.24 from Betfair plus a £25.00 cashback from Betfair.
If it's a draw you collect £170.00. That's £145.00 from Extrabet plus a £25.00 cashback from Betfair.
5. This means that the worst case scenario on the Portsmouth v Cardiff match is a draw and you make £41.00 profit. However, if Cardiff win you make £46.00 and if Portsmouth win you make £42.24. That's a minimum profit of 31%, a much better rate of interest that you would get at any high street bank or building society.
6. It is absolutely vital that you click on the links on this page to open the accounts with the two bookies and enter the correct bonus codes or you may not qualify for the bonuses.
Also, before you place your bets, you should check that the odds haven't changed. If they have, let us know by mail or phone us on 01642 223229 and we will rework the bet for you.
Please feel free to contact us or phone us on 01642 223229 if you have any questions at all about this bet and we will help you as much as we can.
Please note that the bonuses are valid for new customers only so if you already have an account with one or more of the bookies we are using, you won't be able to do this. If that is the case, mail us or phone us on 01642 223229 and we'll create an alternative bet for you using different bookies.
This method of betting was used very successfully during the 2006 World Cup and you can read all about how it was done right here.
We guarantee this bet
It's understandable that some people will not believe that it is possible to do this. "What's the catch?" I hear you asking. My answer to that question is that we have been publishing arbitrage bets for four seasons now and literally hundreds of people have profited from following the advice on these pages.
Only twice has our refund guarantee been triggered and that was when we did all the figures wrong and sent refunds out to those who had followed our advice and made a small loss.
Our refund guarantee works like this. If this bet doesn't work like we say it will and you end up out of pocket, we will refund your losses. Simple as that.
That means that you simply cannot lose on this, whatever happens and even if we messed up the numbers.
The only stipulation here is that you must click on the links on this page to be eligible for the refund guarantee, not that you'll be needing to claim anyway. Just enjoy the profit and stay posted for many more of these throughout the season.
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