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HIGHBURY APRIL 2001
Hello. Jackie Von Penguin here to entertain you in ways of shaven flightless bird pleasure! Oh, and Happy New Year to you all. And this week I will be looking at a very strange encounter the Boro had at Highbury in April 2001.
To set the scene, it was the season in whatever Bryan Robson had been trying to do failed and he lost the plot so badly that he had to get El Tel in to sort his shit out.
And furthermore we were always crap at Highbury- never got anything there at all!
Well how wrong we were. We even gave Man U the title!
So it was Easter 2001 and I was serving my country with distinction. Well actually, I was tossing it off based at Whitehall on a well cushey two month posting at the MOD and I was banging two Army birds at the same time. Not literally of course though I did mention it to them both individually and got knocked back. It would have been class as well...
Anyway I was looking forward to this trip to The Gunners. Meeting a few of the lads and getting hammered big time. It was Easter weekend and I was on duty for all of the previous week and was fucked by Saturday morning.
So at 8am I made my way to my fancy Government apartment to shower, change and went straight back out to meet the lads at a place called Crouch End in North London, which is about three miles from Arsenal.
Now I was very tired and I am not the sharpest knife in the draw at the best of times. When I am so tired, I can't think straight and I caught the Piccadilly Line tube, which was supposed to take me all the way to North London. But I fell asleep as soon as my arse hit the seat and I woke up at Cockfosters. The last stop!
I thought this ain't gonna be my day as I waited for the train to take me back. It did and I met the lads an hour and a half later than our arranged time, just as they where setting off to the ground.
And I was quickly accused of being a puff and not wanting to drink because I couldn't handle it and so forth...
So wanting to redress the balance and get into the half pissed state they were in already, I went and bought four cans of Stella, a half bottle of Jack Daniels and a litre of coke to mix it from a dodgy off licence!
'I will show them who can drink' was my train of thought as we made our way to the home of Arsenal, in hope more than expectation. As I mentioned earlier, we normally get stuffed by Arsenal anyway...
The booze took effect as we and the rest of the Boro fans in the tiny away end found ourselves in fine voice.
The game was weird- we won 3-0 and gave Man Utd the league title! It was almost as if certain Arsenal players wanted to lose, particularly Silvinho who scored two own goals and Edu, who both passed to Boro players at every opportunity.
Then Big Hamilton Ricard, whom I always thought was OK as a Boro player went and finished off a superb Boro move with a clinical finish!
It was all to much for my mate Jason who had been complaining of a dodgy stomach all day on account of an Indian the night before and as the third goal went in he lost control, followed through and then dashed off to the bogs, walking like Charlie Chaplin never to be seen again that day.
We won an unbelievable game. We were in shock and so were the Gooners. They had lost the title on their own ground to Boro.
How we laughed and a night on the town was in order to celebrate the most amazing Boro away win I have seen.
So the four of us made our way to The Sports Bar off Trafalgar Square to watch the late kick off game on Sky.
The drinks were really flowing and I was in fine form as I chatted up an Aussie bird. I think I impressed her with my offer of showing her round the delights of Covent Garden. At least that's what I think I said to her... but my charms, for once, failed and we made our way to Covent Garden and the Punch and Judy pub.
Now this place was packed and many Arsenal fans were in the pub. It wasn't long before me and my friends became involved in a heated discussion with a group of Arsenal fans which caused the door staff to come over. Then things got really interesting as two big Aussie guys grabbed me and one of them asked 'who the fuck did I think I was chatting up his wife and asking if she wanted a no strings quickie?'
Well it took all my Boro charm and wit to escape this one but I did, relatively unscathed, unlike one of my mates who took a whack from a Bouncer after questioning his mother's sexual behaviour.
Anyway the night was young but even so, we were still smashed as we made our way to a Chinese restaurant in Chinatown and into yet more trouble. After a very nice Chinese, we discovered we were about £20 short on the bill and Mike's debit card had just been refused. Scott had to dash off to the cash point, just as it looked as if the fucking Triads had turned up to sort us out.
Someone - probably me - suggested we go to a casino, which we did. I lost all my money and tried many times to pull an older rich lady. Eventually, she got fed up of the pissed Northerner routine and asked the manager to throw me out.
Anyway it was an eventful day and night indeed.
And Scott had more reason to be happy. He won a fortune after I left the casino and he pulled as well. Never mind. We won and I was back to work the next day!
Have fun
Jack
Up the Boro!!!
BACK TO FLASHBACKS INDEX
A GUARANTEED PROFIT OF AT LEAST £40.00 ON NOTTINGHAM FOREST v READING
Here we go again - the season is about to begin! And did you know that it is possible to win money on Sunday afternoon's Championship clash between Nottingham Forest and Reading, whatever the result?
The game kicks off at 1.15pm and we can guarantee you a profit of at least £40.00, whatever the result of the match. All you have to do is follow the simple instructions below and then sit back and enjoy the game. At full-time, you will be at least £40.00 better off, whatever the result of the match.
We must point out that if you want to take this bet, you should do it now because if the odds change, then the figures here will be invalidated. If they have changed, let us know and we will rework the bet for you.
You can still do this if you have a Betfair account but your overall profit will be reduced by £25.00 as you won't receive the £25.00 cashback as an existing account holder.
If you are unsure about this bet, you are most welcome to call us on 01642 223229 and we will help you as much as we can.
We're going to lay out a total of £89.00 on the Nottingham Forest v Reading match and we will collect £131.26 if Nottingham Forest win, £130.84 if Reading win and £129.00 if it's a draw. That's a minimum profit of 45%, a much higher interest rate than you will get in any high street bank.
Here's how it's done. Just follow these simple instructions.
1. Open an account with Coral. It is really important that you enter the bonus code of CORALTD when prompted. This is to ensure that you receive your bonus.
Open an account with Betfair. It is really important that you enter the promotional code of BFB425 when prompted. This is to ensure that you receive your bonus.
Open an account with Extrabet
 .
This shouldn't take you any longer than a few minutes.
2. Make the following deposits into your new accounts.
Deposit £22.00 into your new Coral account.
Deposit £42.00 into your new Betfair account.
Deposit £25.00 into your Extrabet account.
3. Now make the following bets.
Place £22.00 on the draw at 3.25 (9/4) with Coral.
Coral will now add a £10.00 bonus to your account. Place this on the draw as well. You will now have £32.00 riding on the draw.
Back Reading with £42.00 at 2.6 (or higher if available) with Betfair.
Place £25.00 on Nottingham Forest at 2.68 (13/8) with Extrabet .
Extrabet match your first bet up to £25 so you will now have £50.00 riding on Nottingham Forest.
The £25.00 matched bet will not show in your account but you can read all about how it works on the Extrabet site. It's the purple box that says '£25 FREE BET FOR NEW CUSTOMERS' on the top right hand side. Click here to visit the Extrabet site.
If you are unsure about placing these bets, please feel free to mail us or call us on 01642 223229 and we will talk you through it, no problem at all. There is no such thing as a stupid question.
You have temporarily laid out a total of £89.00 on the Nottingham Forest v Reading match. I stress, temporarily... Now sit back, crack a beer open and enjoy the match.
4. Here's what happens at the end of the game. All winnings are paid out on the ninety minute result.
If it's a draw, you collect £129.00. That's £104.00 from Coral plus a £25.00 cashback from Betfair.
If Reading win, you collect £130.84. That's £105.84 from Betfair plus a £25.00 cashback from Betfair.
If Nottingham Forest win you collect £131.26. That's £106.26 from Extrabet plus a £25.00 cashback from Betfair.
5. This means that the worst case scenario on the Nottingham Forest v Reading match is it is a draw and you make £40.00 profit. However, if Reading win you make £41.84 and if Nottingham Forest win you make £42.26. That's a minimum profit of 45%, a much better rate of interest that you would get at any high street bank or building society.
6. It is absolutely vital that you click on the links on this page to open the accounts with the two bookies and enter the correct bonus codes or you may not qualify for the bonuses.
Also, before you place your bets, you should check that the odds haven't changed. If they have, let us know by mail or phone us on 01642 223229 and we will rework the bet for you.
Please feel free to contact us or phone us on 01642 223229 if you have any questions at all about this bet and we will help you as much as we can.
Please note that the bonuses are valid for new customers only so if you already have an account with one or more of the bookies we are using, you won't be able to do this. If that is the case, mail us or phone us on 01642 223229 and we'll create an alternative bet for you using different bookies.
This method of betting was used very successfully during the 2006 World Cup and you can read all about how it was done right here.
We guarantee this bet
It's understandable that some people will not believe that it is possible to do this. "What's the catch?" I hear you asking. My answer to that question is that we have been publishing arbitrage bets for four seasons now and literally hundreds of people have profited from following the advice on these pages.
Only twice has our refund guarantee been triggered and that was when we did all the figures wrong and sent refunds out to those who had followed our advice and made a small loss.
Our refund guarantee works like this. If this bet doesn't work like we say it will and you end up out of pocket, we will refund your losses. Simple as that.
That means that you simply cannot lose on this, whatever happens and even if we messed up the numbers.
The only stipulation here is that you must click on the links on this page to be eligible for the refund guarantee, not that you'll be needing to claim anyway. Just enjoy the profit and stay posted for many more of these throughout the season.
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